Recently multiple close friends made comments to me on the lines of "I feel like my personality is just a bunch of coping mechanisms".

Yes, but, consider the warmest kindest funniest most interesting person you know.

Their personality is also just a bunch of conditioned responses that let them cope in their native environment. Except maybe their native environment is full of love, encouragement, and trust. Or maybe it's the right mix of good and horrible that made them strong and warm?