Evan Jenkins @ejenk@schelling.pt
Whoops forgot the screenshot, but that just makes it funnier.
I only dine at Osteria del Crypto
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RT @_restaurant_bot
Osteria del Fiat - Fate In Fretta A Tavola; Via Giulio Biglieri, 2, 10126 Torino TO, Italy https://www.google.com/maps/place/?q=place_id:ChIJqxafurcSiEcRjSWQZrD7Dy0
https://twitter.com/_restaurant_bot/status/1469507762388414467
why did i tweet that
Just finished the math—Jeff Bezos’s penis (9 inches) emits more cum (in just one ejaculation) than the 1 billion most down bad coomers combined emit in their lifetimes. CRAZY!
They understand sharing better in theory than in practice.
Saffron: *peering into bubble tea cup* “Only one left! Only one left!”
Me: “Who gets the last one?”
Saffron: “Sage.”
Me: “Aww!”
Saffron: *pulls out last boba and eats it*
It says a lot about the French that they don’t have an idiomatic expression for “dos and dont’s”
I would like to remind everyone once again: please do not stan the Gülenist sportsball man.
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RT @joshrogin
New: In the NBA, Freedom stands tall against China https://www.washingtonpost.com/opinions/2021/12/09/enes-kanter-freedom-takes-bold-stance-on-china/ by me @PostOpinions @EnesFreedom
https://twitter.com/joshrogin/status/1469084056356859909
more like cowboy womp womp amirite?
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RT @Nibellion
Netflix has cancelled Cowboy Bebop after one season
https://www.hollywoodreporter.com/tv/tv-news/cowboy-bebop-canceled-netflix-1235060256/
https://twitter.com/Nibellion/status/1469082839882862599
Dear every single app: I do not want to look back on the worst fucking year of my life. Please stop trying to make me.
It’s been an hour and I’m still afraid to flush my toilet.
“What’re you in for?”
“I didn’t wait a full ten minutes after scrubbing my toilet bowl before flushing.”
Imagine going to federal prison for using toilet bowl cleaner wrong
The iconic patriarch of early-90s television: “Make it so.”
The iconic patriarch of early-20s television: “Fuck off.”
Can’t believe it took them 5 years to make Hillary Clinton fanfic real.
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RT @HillaryClinton
I’m excited to invite you to join my new @MasterClass.
I’ll be teaching the skills I developed throughout my career—the challenges, the triumphs, and all the rest.
I hope these lessons will help you chart your own path with passion and purpose. https://mstr.cl/303WrlA
https://twitter.com/HillaryClinton/status/1468641119252758530
Me and my 16 Mastodon followers are ready for the Twitterpocalypse.
