For years I have nursed a hatred of a former who traumatized me, and soon I will be in a position secure enough to freely say some really wrathful things to or about him.
I'm struggling to think of reasons why I shouldn't. I honestly haven't moved on and I can't really see that it's likely that I will.
My main hesitation is that I don't want to hear his response. I know that makes me a bad person but it's the truth.
Other reasons not to let fly:
- I am still embarrassed about one dumb way that I reacted to his shitty behavior and that could be used to hurt me even now
- I am big mad and it's still a good general rule not to act on anger
- it's a small world and he has had 10+ years to build up goodwill among the people at his level
- his wife is even worse than he is, so any lesson I manage to import on him will ultimately fail to find long-term uptake
Kantian reason: if everyone lashed out in wrath at the first safe opportunity, the world would be much worse. Conversely, if everyone kept their wrath under wraps, the world could be much better.
Augustinian reason: I am not yet really ready to fully become a wrathful person. A wrathful person is consigning himself to permanence, to stasis, to death at the hands of whatever inspired the rage. I am not yet done changing and possibly growing. I may yet get over this.
Emersonian reason: Every time I have felt truly hurt by someone, they were superior to me in some way. My job is to decide what way they were superior to me and to decide how I might grow in response.