remembering parts of yourself you havent embodied in a while can be sobering, melancholy inducing; a reminder of all the people you used to be, the possible futures you chose against. some part of each universe lives on inside you, in the self-aspect which would have generated it

when we fantasize about possible worlds, we let ourselves play personality dress-up, try on various goals & priorities, aesthetic choices; this can be a sort of steam release valve, giving us an outlet for all those what-ifs. each daydream is a simulation of what could have been

I imagine, sometimes, attending a party with all of my alternate selves, hearing about their lives, watching their mannerisms, self expression; I can see the choice deltas which would have lead me to each one, but I can't always inhabit their perspectives

how far is too far?

how much can you change before you become a different person? where do you draw the line between your identity and someone else's?

I've crawled out of the husks of previous selves too many times to remember

sometimes this is a one way transition
can't recall being the previous

my current self is a utilitarian one, bound by the constraints of family and practicality, characterized by a certain grim determination

but I have inhabited others in the past, other selves which were not like this

and one day I'll likely outgrow this exoskeleton as well