Cȯsꭑọ ∴ ọꭑƨȯƆ @cosmiccitizen@schelling.pt

1. Curling is for people who like the clacky sounds from croquet but wish they were chonkier.

7 observations about the sport of curling:

College yoga instructor: "You sit wrong. What you're doing is not sitting up straight. Go home and practice sitting."

Reddit comment: "When the knees are higher than the hips, shortness in the back of the pelvis or the hip joints tips the pelvis posteriorly and tips the weight of the body backward. To maintain balance and prevent falling, the spine rounds into flexion. When the hips are raised higher than the knees, the pelvis tips anteriorly and the weight tips forward. This allows for..."

There are reddit comments that have done more for me than entire college classes did on the same subject.

You are the sum of all the things that your friends seem to compulsively talk about around you.

All these stories from abuse support subreddits end with the families going NC (to North Carolina). Very mysterious choice of destination.

In the 2000s you could make obvious fuck-ups on email and act like it was this mysterious process and nobody could blame you.

My counter to both would be:
A. What if you're just a weird lil freak? and what if that's fine?
B. What if the conceptual basis for your entire inner life was arbitrarily assembled without any long-term interest in efficacy? and what if the people who made up "the rules" don't really give a shit about you?

There's something to be written about how TikTok/Tumblr self-diagnosis communities and NoFap dudes are parallel. They both presume that the irrational impulses (sense of unwellness, sense of pleasure-sickness) of a human must be subordinated to & validated by social recognition (medicine, romantic partners). They form communities of peers, nevertheless, to generate the kinds of affirmation that are rarely forthcoming from real audiences.

Wikipedia with the real info.

It's not my country.
It's not my town.
It's not my neighborhood.
It's not my side of the street.
I can dis-identify with anything I want. I can use my identification to redraw the moral balance of the universe.

Wool gnarls at the same fractal scale as mammal skin. They evolved together.

There's something so ironic about injury between friends. The friend who injured is, privately, so scared of the due consequences that they refuse to acknowledge the injury at all. The friend who is injured wants the injury to have never happened and looks for any excuse to forgive it. But forgiveness is specifically excluded by the injuring friend's refusal to recognize the injury. And so to avoid the lesser pain of reconciliation, the injuring friend causes the greater pain of dissolution.

Johannes Gutenberg is the inventor of category theory. Every page of type is a functor between line number and a set of alphanumerical symbols. Post-Gutenberg culture is just working through the variations.

Old academic men really do just want you to listen to them talk.

"Juice" is short for "jouissance."

You'd have a better time talking to Dean Donne, the preacher-poet of corpses, fleas, and maggots; the poet of the consumption and resurrection of the fleshly body in every scintilla of every fingerprint.

The only problem is that Donne would want to trace down the meaning of every calorie. For every 103 calories in a cup of sack, there's 100 in port? And where does this the difference of 3 go? Into effervescent sweetness? Into the foul, corruptible grave of mutable flesh? Or to the Kingdom?

Do you have any concept how hard it would be to explain calorie tracking to Shakespeare? The man drank, fucked, fasted, played, and imagined as well as any human really ever can or will, and he never would have imagined turning your body into a bank account for crumbs.

He wouldn't see the point in any of it. It won't raise the dead or make your parents love you any better. It won't give you glory or trust. It won't even make you funny and strange.

The people who will most vehemently insist to you that the Good Boy Points are part of the essential energetics of the physical universe are also those that spend their days gulping down brown slop and pretending to be a piston as a hobby. I'm not even saying they're wrong! I'm just saying that all transactional values must be transvalued. Do the brown slop and play piston if you want to min-max Good Boy Points. Or don't.

I'm just a dog on the internet. What do I know?

A calorie is a Good Boy Point. You can earn Good Boy Points by doing your chores and playing outside. You can spend Good Boy Points on M&Ms or facial aesthetics.

The whole idea of a Good Boy Point is to subordinate your sensorium to a transaction.

Nobody really cares about the savor or delight that you derive from spending your Good Boy Points. Nobody really has any advice for you about the qualitative drama stemming from this. Nobody really wants to hear what or how you sacrifice or redeem.