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Apples? Salmon? Possibly Starbucks 🤔
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RT @thehellpatrol
If your cum was flavored based on the state you’re from, what would your cum taste like?
twitter.com/thehellpatrol/stat

RT @tenobrus
@cynical_ingroup A man's beloved twitter mutual runs outside, gets hit by a car, and dies. The man mourns this greatly. Before burying the twitter mutual, the man has sex with the twitter mutual's corpse. He never had sex with the twitter mutual when it was live, and never do-

RT @ciphergoth
It's not my fault I created the Torment Nexus. Blame the guy who wrote "Don't Create the Torment Nexus". twitter.com/sama/status/162162

gosh this feels so pretentious I couldn't write tweets like this for a living

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there's nothing that exists or has ever happened that doesn't make sense

if something confuses you, the problem is in your understanding, not the world

them: it's good to have high self-esteem

me: wow I can't even do that much god I suck. what a failure I am, having low self-esteem

twitter analytics for february seem broken

it says I've sent zero (0) tweets and had no interaction

RT @GlitchesRoux
I see it in such perfect detail. Its shimmering scales, its wide-set eyes on either side of its head-- wait, hold on, let me try this again.

I can see it, its swelling gills, the hump indicating it is in spawning season and its body is deteriorating, the smell of-- damn it twitter.com/stinkykatie/status

what do you think in your head when you read "o7"?

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