🌻 kiwi 🌻 @pareinoia@schelling.pt

help can someone help me find that one photo of like a couple's gaming setup where half the room is all white & pink and the other half of the room is all neon, purple, dark, etc & it's a super stark contrast with basically a line going down the middle of the room

dear fucking god
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RT @Chromasophore

https://twitter.com/Chromasophore/status/1418412940319993864

I have been forbidden from posting a much much worse version of this joke so y'all will have to use your imaginations

99.9% kiwi juice, not from concentrate (I have ADHD)

honestly I need this framed on my wall
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RT @itoldmythe

https://twitter.com/itoldmythe/status/1417145595861643267

if Twitter is so good, why didn't they make a Twitter 2?

yup

yeah

do not ever, under any circumstance, expose a brat to a power vacuum

my brain in response to minor or understandable mistakes: sheer panic

my brain in response to serious inexcusable fuckups: literally starts playing the Bojack Horseman theme

nobody even wears them anymore! millennials have by and large grown out of them and zoomers never liked them to begin with. who is buying them???

dear clothing stores, I assure you that your selection of jeans does not need to be 90% distressed and only 10% normal. please. it's $CURRENT_YEAR. please let me have more normal jeans.

and it even lets you change the mood between chill/upbeat/regular

so Spotify Premium Duo (the Premium plan for 2 people) has the cutest fucking feature called Duo Mix where they make you a shared playlist with a mix of the sort of music the two of you like 🥺

fun fact: if you're on SSRIs and you take NyQuil it will reveal secrets of the universe to you

dying
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RT @DrFurfagMD
The BDSM test really fucking changed
https://twitter.com/DrFurfagMD/status/1417950390939799564

and while you're at it, PLEASE add laugh reacts

MAKE THEM PUBLICLY VISIBLE
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RT @Sadcrib
TWITTER ADDING DISLIKES????
https://twitter.com/Sadcrib/status/1417913362999136257

I think "goddamnit I've still got all that polyfill and LED lights in my closet, I've been wanting to make these kinda clouds for like half a year now and still haven't gotten around to it"
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RT @lindawgtwitch
you go into a girls room for the first time & it looks like this what do you immediately think be honest
https://twitter.com/lindawgtwitch/status/1417304104615907333