how many benadryl to make time start unfolding

if you can be one thing, you should be efficient
---
RT @leaacta
I like to drink all my water for the week all at once
twitter.com/leaacta/status/135

RT @chaosprime
"compassion" can be a hell of a code word

to someone who considers life to be suffering, killing you can be an act of compassion

to someone who considers ignorance to be bliss, lying to you to keep you ignorant can be an act of compassion

when I press the buttons on the remote for my bidet it also sets off my automatic hand soap dispenser

at first I delighted in the absurdity of such a modern-day problem but now it's mildly annoying

then there's also my cat's tooth that fell out a little while back

Show thread

still can't decide what kind of jewelry I want to make out of a tooth I got removed recently

RT @thomaschattwill
What can you even say anymore? We wrote a letter about this back in July so that hopefully this wouldn’t happen to you.

RT @jessesingal
Some of us: "Maybe people shouldn't get fired for tweets deemed 'controversial' by random internet mobs"

Twitter progressives:

"Bigot!"

"Fuck you!"

"There's no such thing as cancel culture!"

[Progressive gets fired for tweets]

TPs: "Words can't express the injustice of thi

RT @MasterTimBlais
"my opinions are my own"

are they tho

RT @tower727
Once there were spirits of heath and hollow. When the highway was built through, they thought its trash were offerings. Spirits of pollution now, they live in empty chip bags and styrofoam cups.

Diminished and insane, they bless crops of orange cones and traffic tickets

Show more
Mastodon

a Schelling point for those who seek one