each time this happened, I found myself discovering a new emotional depth in music I thought I'd outgrown, a new way of relating to those same styles, a way to resonate with them

this never failed to astonish, violating my self narrative as it did

eventually i learned from this

I realized that what I was discovering was that those older versions of myself were still very much alive within my being, buried under newer personalities, but no less relevant

and in times of crisis, they were exactly what I'd return to; these self-shells were my Kegan stages

you never truly become someone new; rather, you add on to your previous self, accreting a new way of being; your personality is greebled by your experiences, acquiring new facets as you gain experience

but your earlier iterations do not simply vanish into the void; they remain

in my times of anger, I'd find my metalhead teenager there to help me process it

when I'd feel depressed and lost, my college astronaut, there to guide me down the same paths I'd once trodden

with each emotional crisis, I'd been accumulating personal guides, waiting to help

we never truly outgrow our problems, but rather incorporate them into ourselves, like oysters accreting beauty around their trauma to produce a pearl

each of those hard-won layers has a soundtrack

so next time you hear an old favorite, thank the part of your self which loved it

@pee_zombie Good way to view it.