Alistair Young @cerebrate@schelling.pt

Concerning today's multi-state 911 outage, I should just like to clarify that it wasn't me. It was almost certainly some Russian dude, JUST LIKE LAST TIME.

#notyourcybercriminal

"Today I have restored our access to the dark web! Muahaha!"

"What do you use the dark web for, anyway?"

"Use?"

"..."

"Because people want us not to have it?"

"That's it?"

"You need more?"

All I want to know about the Borderlands movie is who they've cast to play Face McShooty. Who is, as you know, the heart of the entire setting.

Is it just me, or does "The Path of Totality" sound like an excellent name for a cult, martial art, or possibly band?

I mean, intellectually, it is easy to remember that Good Things do not become Bad Things just because they're also considered Good by people with a, hm, statistically high likelihood of stanning mass-murdering fuckheads and/or their ideas.

But the feels, man, the feels are icky.

Request to world:

Would you kindly stop describing Obvious Good Things as Anticapitalist Works, lest I end up stopping supporting them despite their being Obvious Good Things.

(tl;dr My rationality is imperfect! Please help me not succumb to polit tribalism!)

Today's pitch: a zany romantic comedy set in the #DragonAge setting. I call it "The Love Nug".

Incidentally, while I usually boost my writing here when I post it, if you just want that without my other weird ramblings and sarcasm, you can follow it alone at @avatar .

#eldraeverse

Someone stop me before I buy 64,000 LEDs to install a Las Vegas Spherelet on my lawn.

One day I will stop responding to doomful predictions on social media with "Pathetic Earthlings - who will save you now?"

But it is not this day.

(And while I would hate to lose the readers, in my subgenre, one can consider "banned by the CCP" a sign that one's doing something right.)

On another note, my writing is seeing a lot of traffic from sogou.com recently, which seems to be a Chinese search engine?

Mistake me not, I'm happy to have the readers, but I do wonder if this is the first step towards being banned in China (again).

#eldraeverse

This and other stupid-ass memes brought to you by the sort of people who, in the comfort of their warm caves, composed speeches decrying those who considered insane and useless notions like cooking, hot baths, and turning rocks into easy-shape-better-than-rock-stuff "fire bros" who were dangerously arrogant and bent on destroying the caveman way of life in the name of fire for fire's sake.

"But I never thought that fire would cook _my_ meat!", cried Zog, regretting his membership in the Make-Fire-Cook-Antelope faction of the tribe (while on fire).