me: ok i wish to uh maximise the total time-discounted uh actually no discounting just total uh impartial long-run welfare of uh sentient life in the light... cone... wait, is FTL possible, okay in the cosmos, which includes like... everything, hang on, wait, no- moral uncertainty, this might be bad in some unanticipated way- okay i wish to maximise utility. there. maximise utility.
kyubey: :3 you're hired
me: like, as a magical girl? cool. so like does the wish-
kyubey: :3 welcome, incubator