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RT @ebruenig
dude it's kind of eerie what they actually did to him considering the way we tend to treat gods around here twitter.com/JustHavingATime/st

me in the DC Metro: oh wow this looks like Fallout
me 20 minutes later: OH SHIT WAIT I KNOW WHY

why is this so hot

what the fuck is wrong with me
---
RT @oblativelamb
*to my schizophrenic gf* yeah, i would never let them microchip me, shits evil for sure.

*to my cia gf* so if i get her to bomb this post office, you'll let me cum tonight?
twitter.com/oblativelamb/statu

RT @thesravaka
Hahahahahahahaha How The Fuck Is The Housing Shortage Real Hahahaha Just Stop Zoning Like That Like Build Houses Haha

well that explains all of me
---
RT @sonyasupposedly
cats demonstrate the potent force of desirability combined with unwillingness to accommodate
twitter.com/sonyasupposedly/st

RT @hyperdiscogirl
adderall? why would I want to take a drug that makes everything turn into snakes

the results are beautiful
---
RT @drethelin
People with vaginas: would you rather get oral sex with no penetration, or get penetration with no oral?
twitter.com/drethelin/status/1

RT @funkyduffy
@pjsempe @bowserbot2 The history of human advancement is the process of scraping life back from the abyss, soul by soul. It's probably the one thing that really matters the most, and we have a duty to contribute to that process however we can.

RT @ElectionLegal
he was in her media tab
she was in his likes tab
can I make it any more obvious?

RT @kiryussideburns
we've entered the era where people don't know what bishonen is twitter.com/kuribees/status/13

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