👁️ autosurveillant 👁️ @pee_zombie@schelling.pt

I run into this constantly with people who perceive questions as attacks; they are skeptical that my questioning is motivated by curiosity, rather than conniving, which I find deeply tragic. when did they learn to silence their inner child, killing their sense of wonder?
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RT @IntractableLion
Does "why? " feel like an attack if you haven't examined your world in a while?
https://twitter.com/IntractableLion/status/1421835033069768704

don't really do personal posts here but not much else on my mind lately so:

my relationship of several years ended recently on very bad terms. not really doin so hot so may be on here less for a while. dont pass up an opportunity to tell your loved ones how you feel. stay frosty

an elaboration on this theme

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RT @pee_zombie
those of us with attention-modulation issues tend to suffer from degenerate parallelism, ie multitasking which is slower than a naive serial approach, due to a variety of failure modes; two major ones are deadlocks & thrashing

these lead to resource exhaustion & poor performance
https://twitter.com/pee_zombie/status/1419795815703498752

meanwhile, I'll keep doing what I'm doing; seeking out better ways to think & teaching those who would listen. I've had some success w/ this & find it rather satisfying; there are worse legacies to leave than a slightly smarter world. those I lift up will go on to do the same.

I can't blame someone for their naive status-seeking behavior; we all start somewhere. I just find it saddening when one values their status over their search for truth & better ways of being.

I hope our society becomes more welcoming of this project, so that we all may benefit.

ironically, in the eyes of myself and others, it has the opposite effect; among engineers, respect and hierarchy works differently than in other parts of the world. admitting you don't know something and seeking to rectify that gap is much higher status than already knowing all.

some of the less... capable, engineers that I work with, they tend to avoid being honest with themselves and others; they talk themselves around admitting they don't know something, they bullshit their way through explanations to protect their egos and perceived social standing

I find many people feel otherwise, which has always been difficult for me to understand; I do intellectually get how a fixed mindset of intellectual insecurity would motivate one to avoid honest introspection, but it's hard to put myself in those shoes

I see this at work, often

chances are it wouldn't, but that shouldn't stop us anyway; I'd personally much rather face the truth of my situation than feel falsely satisfied w/ a suboptimal system

if there are tangible steps I could take to improve my ability to think (& there certainly are) I want to know

I imagine there are those who would reject the validity of such a project, as it would inherently involve ranking people's reasoning abilities against each other, which is not something many would approve of

I wonder if it quantifying the utility of any given point would help

is it possible, or even desirable, to undertake such a survey? to build an ontology and taxonomy of thought-machinery, with tools for locating one's self within it?

if it is, it may enable us to guide metacognitive growth, to easily suggest next steps for any given person

there may be, & likely are, many subsets of reasoning-mode space which are invisible to me, modalities of thought which I may lack the tools to envision; many of these are likely strictly superior to my current one

how can we systematically explore this space & rank these modes?

some part of me is aware that there are very smart people who think in a radically different way than I do, and yet are capable of intellectual feats I couldn't dream of

that to them, my reasoning mode may seem stilted, robotic, devoid of life

I wonder how many of these exist

I'm wondering if that's why many people seem incapable of thinking, to me; that they don't even realize that there is a game happening, that there are rules to learn, competence to be achieved

they think the blind men can never perceive the elephant, that that's all there is

to be honest, I do experience the former when first exploring new modalities, ideas, analytical lenses; I feel blind, crippled, unable to exert my full reasoning ability due to lacking an understanding of this new game's rules

but I always seek to get to the latter, & I know how

this took me a very long time to understand, as I've treated reasoning in this way for as long as I can remember; as a deterministic process with distinct objects and transformation rules between them

now I'm no longer sure which came first; programming skill or reasoning skill

I'm beginning to realize that the former more closely matches most people's experiences with formal reasoning

many don't even know the latter is an option in terms of "how to think"; forget being able to do it

that ideas are possible to treat in this way doesn't occur to them

when first grappling with some new language, platform, framework etc I often initially feel blind, clumsy, just sort of groping around in the dark, trying to figure out what's what

then when I set up proper debugging & can step through library code, the world opens up before me

it really do be like that tho

altho tbh doesn't matter much if y'all do bc vast majority of us will never meet
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RT @yashkaf
@thinkagainer Related: "boy i sure hope the people who only know me from my twitter where I go to be snarky and opinionated somehow intuit how caring and sensitive i am in person and appreciate me for that"
https://twitter.com/yashkaf/status/1420928035482648577